[alissa]
insert name here
University of Michigan
Biomedical Engineering
Chemical Engineering
Ph.D. pre-candidate
Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Chemical-Biological Engineering
S.B. 2007
nerd sailor mercury

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jacob
okie
adam
zach
collin

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Pearls Before Swine
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Wednesday Oct 22 2008, 9:59 PM
More HK and Half-marathon

The rest of the conference involved me trying desperately not to fall asleep and then kind of getting hit on by some venture capitalist guy, which is not the same one that I was talking about earlier. It was actually his partner, whom had spent a year in Ann Arbor and had also done his Ph.D. at Harvard so I told him he sucked. Actually I'm kidding, I didn't, but he did give me his business card and then emailed me after the conference which was kind of stalkerish. But hopefully it'll be a good networking thingy. I also ended up going to this really touristy area called Tsim Sha Tsui, which was exactly like the asian cities in the movies: huge buildings, lots of neon lights, basically chaos on the streets. Did not get lost though. Go me. I had some excellent sushi which was rolled into little balls or cut into cubes. Much fresher than anything we can get over here in Michigan. Then flew 3.5 hours to Tokyo and 11 hours back to Detroit and along with the 12 hour time difference somehow managed to get back on EST (somewhat) before the Detroit marathon.

So I ran the half, and that went pretty well, I got about the time I wanted to get, and considering I blew off a lot of the training and was probably still jet-lagged I think I did pretty well for my first time. The race was tough though -- the course is pretty difficult due to the tunnel (1 mile underground, not much air and it's weird) and the Ambassador bridge. You run over the bridge into Canada, which is cool, but it was so crowded on the bridge that we all bumped into each other and almost had to stop running at one point. People were not pleased because it slowed us all down A LOT. Anyway, I finished, so yay! Would like to do another couple half marathons and then maybe a full when I have more time to train properly. Was fun though, and crazy to see that many people freezing their asses off at 7:15 in the morning when it's 30 degrees and not even light out yet. AWESOME.

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Saturday Oct 11 2008, 1:41 AM
Hong Kong

So here's something exciting, right now I'm sitting in the atrium of Hong Kong University of Science and Techonology, which is practically outside since it's like 80+ degrees and the entire school is all open-air stuff. I'm in Hong Kong for the Synthetic Biology 4.0 conference. I'm here with my advisor, sort of, we're staying in the same hotel but I never see her because she seems to think I'll be OK wandering around by myself even though I don't know where anything is and don't speak Chinese. They say everyone speaks English here but that is totally a lie. Anyway, I've only gotten lost once, in a MALL of all places, but the mall was fucking huge and there were thousands of people and i was the only non-asian. It was insane. And really weird.

Aside from that, Hong Kong is beautiful, well at least the scenery is, there are a lot of rivers and coastline (duh) but it's practically like a rainforest here, it's super humid and there are trees and random mini-mountains all over the place and a bajillion apartment buildings. It's crazy, these things are like something out of a sci-fi movie except they look really really gross and dirty. I haven't seen one house anywhere, its all these skyscraper apartments buildings, one after another, packed so tight that I was looking at 6 all right next to each other, in one complex, and then when we drove by I realized that the rows went three deep. Crazy.

As for the conference, my advisor is giving a talk in the next session but I have no idea where she is. I was going to tell her good luck but she's kind of small and asian and tends to blend in. I also skipped the first morning session because I needed to get miles in for the half-marathon next week. Kinddddd of a busy timeeee. There was a poster session yesterday and I only had to explain it to three people and one guy came buy and read it and nodded approvingly, which was good. And the other people didn't really ask any hard questions, one was this venture capitalist guy whom I had been talking to earlier, so maybe he'll give me money or something. There certainly are lots of interesting people here but most just want to talk about synthetic biology but I'm kind of sick about talking about that, also, I just started my project and I don't really have any results or know as much as most people here. Which is good for learning but not so much when people ask you questions you don't know the answer to, which happened at lunch yesterday so I just bullshitted some stuff. It was one of those "Why are you doing this instead of this other thing?" questions, and I'm like "Bitch, cause my advisor told me to! Bitch." She really was a bitch. Also kind of toady-looking. Anyway I have to stop writing because I am sitting outside and it is hot as balls.

Quick note on the food. Very strange, better than that shit you get in the states, but so far I've had way too many things fried or covered in other things and tapioca beans inserted into, like, every dessert. But it's mostly free so, eh.

2008-10-14 02:12:03
okie
Alissa, you are fucking hysterical and make fucking shit-tons of sense!

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Monday Jul 21 2008, 2:32 PM
i used the word "blurb" today as part of the title of a file i sent to one of my labmates. as in, "research blurb". totally valid usage.

also, im pretty sure that most of the people in my lab are scared of me, or at least think im crazy. which is OK, i suppose, because then maybe i can intimidate them into doing my bidding. however, i don't want everyone to think im a crazy psycho bitch, cause im not really, i just don't like my stuff moved all over the place! see, we got all these undergrads, and we don't have enough benches for all of them to have their own bench, so this one guy, let's call him mr. hippie, lets his helpers use my bench. which.... I will allow... but only because i think that killing him would send the wrong message and maybe i should learn to share. but you aren't supposed to share lab benches! things could get all messed up! anyway, i always complain to my undergrad, because when the others use my bench they use up all my stuff and move it around and don't replace it, and this becomes a problem when i am in the middle of an experiment and i reach for a pipette and there are none and then im like "FUCK! gah!" and i have to go run and find one and this is a problem. so when my undergrad asked me where she should put the extra plates because she knew that "if she put them in the wrong spot i might get really mad or something..." i was like, hm, maybe i should not get so pissed off. but actually i am completely justified because in a lab you shouldn't move people's stuff. you should just get your own, and I should stop sharing my feelings with my minion. i think that she thinks we're friends and then she shows up an hour late and that is not cool. she needs some time outs, obviously.
2008-07-21 15:23:08
Jacob
It sounds kind of a lot like you maybe might need a time out.

Just sayin.
2008-07-22 11:06:03
alissa
if by 'time out' you mean 'vacation' then heck yea i do.
2008-07-22 17:23:17
Jacob
That's exactly what I'm saying.

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Monday Jul 14 2008, 9:28 PM
moving!

so I moved this weekend. yay. now I'm living in a real house with J. and R. By "real" i mean not a college house -- it has a garage and a basement and is new and clean and not gross. but the most important part is that my closet is HUGE. so big I could have a closet party just in the closet. I might actually do that. it's very inspirational, in that it inspires me to feed it with clothes. also, there is a corn field across the street from our subdivision (yea, we're like, in the suburbs) and there is this big creepy-looking tree sitting out in the middle of the field. It's kind of cool and every time I see it I have this huge urge to run through the corn out to the tree. which is a little weird. however i am slightly worried about getting lost. hmmm. will keep updates on whether or not i actually get lost in the corn one day.

other things...oh! I got funding for next year. which is good. but now I am worried I might give up on leaving after I get my masters' because I am too lazy to move again and deal with getting a job. especially since the funding can possibly be extended to 2 or 3 years. I got the Cellular Biotechnology Training Program Fellowship, which is basically a group of people who all do biotech related stuff here at Michigan, and then if your advisor is affiliated, you can be nominated for a fellowship. They give them out to about a few people every year, and then you just have to take a class and meet with the rest of the people once a month and share research and stuff. Not a big deal. My advisor knows that I was thinking of just getting a masters' and says they probably won't hunt me down if I take the money for one year and then leave. which is nice, but still doesn't help me decide what I want to do with my life. sigh...

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Tuesday Jun 17 2008, 2:44 PM
probably the greatest thing about this is the music.
kind of cool Domino thingy
or that the guy spelled "domino" wrong. man, i hate spelling errors.

also, this is just moronic. and sad. oh amsterdam, what ridiculous times we had together. thanks to some of my idiot friends....

2008-06-22 18:02:25
okie
I like that domino thingy. It's neatoe.

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Tuesday Jun 10 2008, 10:07 AM
two interesting/nice things happened yesterday:
1. an old man gave me and d. a free chocolate chip cookie (!)
2. david sedaris drew a penis in my new book.


1. so, first, the cookie. d. and i were at the Earl of Sandwich, a sandwich shop, getting dinner before the Sedaris talk, and being girls, were examining the chocolate chip cookies at the register quite closely. they looked good, but, of course, we decided not to get any. although truthfully, i was planning on going back and getting one on the way out. anywhoo, we sat down with our sandwiches, and then the old guy working the register, whom i believe is the owner, came over to our table, set a cookie in the middle, and said "For future reference." I was like, omg, someone just gave me a free chocolate chip cookie. this is like, one of the best things that has EVER happened to me. and i thanked him profusely. there was probably too much thanking going on, but i had to make up for d. who had food in her mouth. anyway, it was DELICIOUS. it made my day.

2. so yea, we go to see David Sedaris at Borders, who was much older, shorter, and fatter than i thought he would be, although i still wouldn't call him fat, exactly. more... plumpy. so he read some stuff from his new book "When You Are Engulfed in Flames" and it was funny. he is pretty amusing in person as well. then we went to go get our books signed, and d. was in line ahead of me. now most authors just write: to so and so, then their name. but not good ol' dave! d. had her book inscribed to "Matthew", which is clearly not her name. The conversation then proceeded thusly:

DS: Soooo who is Matthew?
d.: ummm, a friend.... (he's her ex bf)
DS: Ohhhh, OK. SO have you ever seen him naked?
d.: ummmmm. yes. (very red and embarrassed)
DS finished signing her book, she walks away laughing while I am yelling at her, "Wait a sec! Who is this Matthew character?!"
then i see DS is drawing something in my book.
Me: What are you drawing?!
DS: Oh, this is Matthew.
Me: Well I don't know Matthew, but thanks for illustrating that for me. Really appreciate it.
DS: Enjoy!

i walk back to my chair and look in my book. on the title page, there is now a rather lumpy-looking penis with an arrow pointing to it that says "Matthew". Nice. d. felt bad but i was like, "Are you kidding? If i ever decide to sell this on ebay, i bet it would go for wayyyy more than a book without a penis drawing in it!" I was pleased.

2008-06-12 09:40:31
okie
goat detection
2008-06-12 11:49:27
alissa
what

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Monday Jun 2 2008, 8:49 PM
hm. it is 8:30 pm and i am sitting in my office. and i will probably be here till like 11:30. uncool. it would be ok if i like, got up at noon like most of the grad students but im a freak and i get up early. however, i did leave to go get dinner, but seriously. this is all the kid who was using the microplate yesterday's fault. grrrrr.

anyway, so this is kind of funny: yesterday i was at this breakfast place called afternoon delight. and i ordered the tuna salad plate, and when i was done i say to dave "wow, that was really good tuna salad! i wonder what they put in it?" (the addition of 'really' is debatable here, i contend i never said the word, but whatever). so we go up to the register, and the woman is like "what did you have?", so she could split the bill. and im like "the tuna" and she says "ummmm, you mean the chicken salad?" and im like, omg. i am soooo stupid. and dave is like peeing his pants laughing, and is like, "that's why it tastes so good! it tastes like MURDER!" but the woman is worried cause some people would throw a shit fit at this point, but i wasn't mad, i was more worried about getting sick later. although it was kind of funny. i just kind of ignored the fact that the texture of the tuna was really, odd......hah. anyway, i did get kind of sick later. blech.
2008-06-03 17:23:25
Jacob
I don't feel like it's really even necessary for me to respond to that story with any specific comment. You know exactly what I think about it.
2008-06-04 00:59:49
okie
I thought that could have been one paragraph.

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Thursday May 15 2008, 1:32 PM
The night before last i had a very strange dream, and im not sure what it meant. I was at school, but this school was sort of MIT/Michigan set in like, colorado or something. It was all covered in snow and on a mountain, and friends from both schools were there, so i was really confused as to where we actually were. anyway, so we had just finished finals or something, because everyone was really happy. then i saw joe and jake, except i went up to jake and said "hi joe!" and he was like "hey" but then i realized that i had mixed them up because joe's hair was like, straightened! but no one really cared, but i felt stupid anyway. then we left the school, and i saw my friend shreya and we were going to walk back to our apartment, but then i realized that i had NO IDEA where i lived, even though i knew i had lived there for awhile. this was very frustrating. i was pretty scared, but shreya said she'd show me where it was. then we walked by this pavilion where they were giving out free pizza to students, and siberian huskies, for some reason. so i walked along the pizza line trying to find one without meat, but they all had meat! then i saw a guy making a completely chocolate pizza with little chocolate circles on it, and he says "ohhh, you like chocolate, huh?" and i was like, heck yea. so then i waited but he wouldn't give me any, he just kept putting more and more pieces on the plate until i got frustrated and left.

at this point i realized that i had lost shreya, and i was kinda freaked out, but then i saw this girl darcee, whom i havent talked to ages, and she offered to show me where we all lived. apparently it was like this big group house. anyway, we finally got there, and it turned out to be totally awesome, like this huge ski chalet thing, and we even had an indoor pool/hot tub. but when we got there it was empty and really dark, and i just had this feeling that we were in a horror movie and someone was about to jump out and kill me. so i ran and hid in the bathroom, which was good because the i realized that i REALLY had to pee. but for some reason i was sitting on the toilet upside down, which wasn't working and i couldn't figure out what was wrong. then i woke up. weird.
2008-05-15 14:48:18
Jacob
The dream means you should start eating meat again.

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Wednesday May 7 2008, 2:44 PM
profundity is a good word

omg. my PI (primary investigator/research advisor) just wrote me an email because she wants to move our meeting tomorrow, and then she ended it by saying "You looked kind of tired when I saw you this morning. Is everything ok?" which translates to: "You look like shit. what is wrong with you?" admittedly, i was more tired than usual today, probably because i have been trying to drink less caffeine, and because i have been thinking about what i want to do with my life wayyy too much, and because it's gross outside today, and i think i have pretty bad SAD.

however, the rain is good because i bought these cute wellies from JCrew with little pink elephants on them, and i've been wearing them around all day and im pretty sure i look like an idiot because they make my feet look monstrous. but i'll have the last laugh cause now its raining.

anyway, just wanted to add that yesterday i was going around all day staring at people because i had my big sunglasses on and knew that they couldnt see me looking. then i realized that i had been wearing my glasses all day. shit.

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Tuesday May 6 2008, 12:07 PM


anyway, yea my life isn't very exciting right now. but i visited boston two weekends ago, and that was really good. i got to see many good friends, and i realized that i actually have more friends back in boston than i thought. also had some much-needed girl time, and people-who-aren't-attached-to-their-bf/gf-at-the-hip time. cause that is just super annoying. boston was beautiful though; i nearly cried when i saw the charles and all the trees blooming and shit. aw, im such a sap these days. beast roast was kind of lame -- i think it has gotten worse every year since my freshman year. and the drama level has steadily increased. managed to avoid certain "undesirables", one in particular whom i snubbed repeatedly, and im pretty sure several people didn't recognize me as i was 'incognito' with my huge sunglasses and short hair. the snubbing was quite pleasurable. and deserved. leaving was like graduating again. it was really sad. i started crying on the plane. seriously. was pretty quiet about it though, pretended like i was sleeping. with really leaky eyes.

so michigan is as droll as ever. although it is really nice in the spring, and everything looks a lot prettier, and i only have 2 months left with my slob of a roommate, so yay. i am about 90% sure that i am going to leave after getting my master's and get a job in consulting. in some big city. any big city. preferably NYC, Boston, LA, or London. not necessarily in that order. however, i have not told my PI about this yet, soooo yeaaaa. but she said I've been doing really good work so far, and that she's impressed, so hopefully i can make myself chill out some. but we all know how well that will work.

also, in case you were wondering, that's the "brainy, nerdy" sailor moon over there. in middle school a couple of friends and i decided we were like the sailor moon girls. obviously i was the smart one. we even had a cute short girl with red hair who was the little pink-haired one. yup, we were pretty cool.

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